That we are not consumed. Because His compassions fail not. The comfort of the beauty of the sky and the beauty of the smells of the flowers, can do much to remind us of God's goodness.
When the heart is broken and disappointed and distressed and angry and sad; faith comes by hearing the word of God. God promises to wipe every tear from our eyes. God promises, that if He be for us who can be against us. Whatever the providence that we are enduring, over and over, the waves of distress roll and threaten, as the hymn states the soul, with infinite loss.
Daily when the new borns were in our house I would wake with that sense of utter loss and the sense of utter lack of control over life or death. My heart would be in my mouth, is the baby going to be blue? Like baby Ben was?
The color of them, often looked close to that. God, what if it happens again, I would ask? Where are you?
I know that, but for the grace and mercy of God, I would be in Hell. I am thankful for every small mercy. Weeping on the shoulder of a loved one...crying over some sad providence or loss of a loved one. I will lift up my eyes unto God for strength, even when the pain of loss seems to rise over me.
When Abby died, I had to go to the funeral of one of Ben's cousins and my heart was broken, but I was not with family. They were gone. One sister-in-law hugged me and my heart could find leave to the torrents of grief that were pent up, by decorum.
There was some refreshment in having someone to cry upon. That is a loss to an eldest sister.
Sharon cared for me like a baby in the primitive grief of my loss of baby Ben. I had no personal controls. I had no sense of help or comfort, just grief and primitive. Where are you, God? I couldn't even say that. The discipline of the soul is to justify God, in His providences. I thank you for what I do have?
I thank you for life, health and strength, I thank you for the comforts and hope of comforts that are there. I thank you for the love of family, friends and the people of God. I thank you for the hope of heaven and the new heaven and the new earth. I thank you for the tears that I am able to shed for my ineptitudes and losses.
David, gave vent to his griefs in songs and hymns and that is what it means to be filled with the spirit as the scripture states.
Holy Week, Lord, I thank You that the price was paid for my soul's salvation and that there is redemption in the blood of Jesus for me. There is no comfort higher than that.
God has a purpose and a plan for my life and I must arise to the challenge of the new day and walk with Him to see the new mercies that are for me, in my relationship with Him. To the grieving He says I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in Me will never die. Jesus trusts certain trials to the godly to show forth His praise and the gift of the Spirit of Longsuffering. Love, and commitment to loving God and justifying His plan for my life amidst the deepest griefs are a Christian commitment. Bear one another's burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ. Suffering with Him and suffering, being comforted by Him, do not dry the tears today, but they do much to open the eyes to a tomorrow of hope in the gloom.
Blind unbelief is sure to trace His providence in vain.
Christ is His own interpreter and He will make it plain.
Singing the hymns is a comfort. Praying for grace and reading the scriptures is a comfort. Lord, I thank You, that although I feel abandoned by You in this providence, that cannot be true. You promised never to leave me. Never to leave me alone. I wept many days at Deloryce singing, never alone. I felt totally abandoned. I believed God when I heard her sing that. I could sense that He is with me and that He would be with me in this darkest time.
It really is always darkest, before the dawn.
No comments:
Post a Comment