2 Samuel 1: 19"The beauty of Israel is slain on your high places! How the mighty have fallen! 20 Tell it not in Gath, Proclaim it not in the streets of Ashkelon-- Lest the daughters of the Philistines rejoice, Lest the daughters of the uncircumcised triumph. 21 "O mountains of Gilboa, Let there be no dew nor rain upon you, Nor fields of offerings. For the shield of the mighty is cast away there! The shield of Saul, not anointed with oil. 22 From the blood of the slain, From the fat of the mighty, The bow of Jonathan did not turn back, And the sword of Saul did not return empty. 23 "Saul and Jonathan were beloved and pleasant in their lives, And in their death they were not divided; They were swifter than eagles, They were stronger than lions. 24 "O daughters of Israel, weep over Saul, Who clothed you in scarlet, with luxury; Who put ornaments of gold on your apparel. 25 "How the mighty have fallen in the midst of the battle! Jonathan was slain in your high places. 26 I am distressed for you, my brother Jonathan; You have been very pleasant to me; Your love to me was wonderful, Surpassing the love of women. 27 "How the mighty have fallen, And the weapons of war perished!"
I do love the faith that makes David weep aloud and yet with hope in the most High God that comforts will come. God allows us a peek into the heart of a man with humble love for God and those around him. In a large family, our hearts can become calloused to love and aloof from real relationships. Like riches, family has a way of insulating you from outside and real relationships. The fact that we do not read of David's grief for other family members, in scripture and that God allows us to see the love that penned this lament makes me try to translate some of the sentiments that I see in him to my own mind.
Perhaps they are jaded with my own experiences of loss, and being a woman, but it helps me to think that God is teaching us to continue to love, in spite of loss.
David's lament for Jonathan.
Can I say how I have loved my brother? My heart is broken, broken. The world must know. The sky is dark and the streets are empty for my beloved brother has left this earth. We laughed and cried and hoped together. It does seem too soon, I cry. I loved my brother, I cannot think of anything that I loved better than that. To see that father and son team in extravagant embraces, was beyond the reach of my earthly relationships. I loved Jonathan as a brother and he loved me as well. He is gone and my heart weeps aloud for the loss, from this earth. My heart would leap when I would see your face. There was little delight on earth but the safety of your friendship. Others have had ulterior motives and mocking glances, but never Jonathan. Others have been fans or onlookers, but, never Jonathan. He saw through the facades. He loved in the realm of earth. Where it cost him dearly. He loved me whether the earth approved or not. I loved him whether life allowed or not. I had thought that we would see these days together and dandle our children and affect Israel together. I had thought that one more time, I would be comforted in the glance and embrace of my brother. I had thought that war would have spared me my one treasure. The love and delight of my heart. I am broken at the thought of going on into the future, without that love to comfort me. Father and mother aside and apart, God has given me the comfort of one true friend. One true love, one true brother and I will ever remember that God was faithful to delight my soul with this. Everyone should be crying because the world was a more royal and beautiful place, with the regal and magnificence that Saul allowed us to enjoy. Everyone should be mourning for we have all lost heroes and mighty ones in the battle. But I above all. I lost hero and king. I lost friend and enemy and family. But more, I have lost the closest brother and friend that I had in the world. I have known that God would comfort me in all of my distresses. I have known that the darkest valleys, God embraces and comforts me. Comfort me, in this dark valley, Lord. God, give hope and help and restore my heart from the pieces that it collapses from, this day. My dearest one is gone. My brother is lost. My love feels bereft.
an imaginary letter from Jonathan to David, found after his passing
(Aug 11, 2005)
The death of Jonathan, eternally the loving friend of David!
My dearest David,
The battle has been especially fierce lately and although my courage is high, fear is just under the surface, lately. I so long for those days when we were fighting shoulder to shoulder and fear seemed so far away. I had never before seen a man with such an abandonment to the will of God as you were in our youth. Golliath was immense and fierce and you were a little squirt and didn’t even flinch from fear as the rest of us.
I must confess that I never thought you’d succeed but when you did, you gained my unfailing devotion.
As a man, I thought there could never be one who would impress me in this life. In the freedom of faith and the love of God, you hurled the stone that callapsed 2 giants in my life, Golliath,one and my father, the other. I honor my father, but lived under the shame of my never living up to his expectations. His stinging and crushing dissappointment in me had become the giant of my life and with the blow of Golliath to the ground and the songs that spread of your fame, you helped me to see him as fallible and human. I will never be able to thank you enough for that.
I wanted you to become king! I love the spirit of God that empowered you in everything that you do. I know that it was God because of how it freed me! When we die in one of these battles, whether today or tomorrow, know that I had to stand next to you for just a moment of my life in order to feel strong. David has truly killed his 10,000’s and my support has always been for you. I love you more than I have ever loved anyone in my life and I am grateful to God to have had the privilege of loving you. I simply could never tell you how healing to my soul your love has been. Thank you!
Jon
Remember the day that you came into our house and we became close friends. I never imagined that we would live to see the day that my father would agree with me that you were golden. He really does agree with me now. When we were fighting today he said to me that this is the kind of battle you wish you had a Dave at your right hand. And I know that he meant that. We both love you. I wish that I could’ve lived to see your kingdom prosper and flourish as I am sure it will, but it is enough for me to have loved you. I hope that I have encouraged you a little in this life as you have me. You are a genuine friend. A man among men who introduced me to prayer and praise. I am still repeating that one that you showed me about Jehovah being my shepherd. Only you could have written that one. I didn’t mean to laugh when I read it, but it seemed funny that a poor little fellow could see Jehovah as being so very big in his life. I have had every luxury and my vision of Jehovah had been clouded by this sense of inadequacy and hopelessness. You made me see Jehovah as larger than my father and my love of Him has grown as my love of you has grown. Truly, I am like the little sheep that were in your care as a child and Jehovah has shepherded my soul in many valleys. My grief for your continued distance from our family has taken a toll on my body and soul and some days I cry from morning to night desiring some hymn of comfort, to which I had grown so accustomed. Jehovah comes, in spirit, to comfort me.
I do remember what a knack you have for rejoicing. I need some of that mirth right now. I wish you were here to tell me a joke. Gloom seems to be as thick as peanut butter. Why do the nations rage? You would say. These things don’t seem like they will pass. I long for peace. The losses are mounting and sometimes it gets to me. Knowing that Jehovah will collect our souls to the fathers is something that I learned from you. I still sing that little song in the morning that you sent for my birthday. Where shall we indeed go from His spirit? He is even here in the darkness of the sheol of war. With His hand he will indeed save me! I can find some comfort in that.
It seemed my greatest comfort to have had a hope to do my duty and die next to you in the battle. Jehovah has denied me that, but as I look into eternity with the hopes of the comforts of Abrahamic covenant, it seems that I will miss you even there. Earth has no sorrow, that heaven cannot cure. I do pray that God would be merciful to me, as you have… My soul trusts in the shadow of his wings and I know that He is the most high… I am looking to Him,to come from Heaven to save me; but it is very hard when the battle rages as it is. My soul also is among lions and those very ravenous and rejoicing, already over our souls. My heart is fixed, O God… I too, am trying to awaken my praise because the mercy of God is so great He is to be exalted above all the earth and even over the shame of this kind of a death…I pray that you would find this with my belongings and know that we thought of you, even here.
