It was with eager anticipation that I sat in the sanctuary, awaiting a Word from the Lord!

It is rare, these days, to get into the sanctuary. I had brooded for weeks and complained aloud of my dissatisfaction at our lateness habit.

Yesterday was no different, but we found a way into the sanctuary in spite of it. I was delighted that the holiday had found the sanctuary less full than usual. I settled my soul in my usual seat, which was completely empty. I entered wholeheartedly into the worship service. We extolled Him and praised, as is our habit, but not taken for granted. We requested God to come and He did not disappoint us.

Pastor wasn't there. That was disappointing. Each week, his presence seems to represent an overcoming of obstacles and hindrances to get to the house of prayer. He doesn't keep his reticence from us. That is the essential part of his leadership. Like my hero Horatio, he seemingly walks right into the oncoming cannons of the battle to instruct us in the way. It truly feels like that, each week. He is truly aware of the spiritual centrality of the thing that he does, each week and he guides us through the spiritual minefields with courageous fear and fierceness, as ironic as that sounds. He doesn't miss the fact that he has fallen here and there and his spirit seems to get up from the fallenness and give us instruction over his body on the floor. That is what we, who struggle, love about Pastor Loran. It is not a cultural show or a tradition. It is somewhat an imploring of God to own us and to give us direction for life; it is the fruit of consistent and constant devotion to worship.

Yesterday, was another viewpoint and I was prepared for the doctrinal upheaval that this would cause in our perhaps overly scrutinizing crew. As Pastor Conn laid out his introduction, I was taking notes as to how I would explain his approach to the superpreacher and the antipreacher crowd which was sure to have it out, on the way home. God comforted my heart and gave me grace to listen for myself and not for the pro and cons that I knew I would face.

This one is for you, He seemed to say. This is an unsermon for an unlistener and that is you! Thank you, Lord, I love Him for knowing the me that is truly me. I love His presence and I hate the fact that familiarity breeds contempt for even the most beautiful interplay on the earth, God's speaking to His people. I will continue to listen to God and I will continue to try to grow in my desire for Him, inspite of the self-seekers and the supertraditionalists that hear and receive in a different way than I do.

This was God coming as a Grandpa and putting His hand on your back and telling you to continue to give ear to the word of the Lord from every segment that He will speak. Don't miss Him for the arguments and debates. I do receive that!

And sure enough, the fireworks started, as soon as we got into the car together. Did we get a sermon, today or not? Why? I love those questions. It means I have listeners in my family.