Are the fruit of the Spirit a set up?

As I reminisce about my own spiritual journey, I remember thinking tha God doesn't answer my prayers because I must not really belong to Him.  I remember trying to pray opposite prayers for a while to trick God into doing what I wanted him to do.   I am not sure that any other children do this, but I am sure that when we teach children the scriptural truths we must listen to their perceptions and guide them to see what God is saying.  

   For instance, we should make it clear that we cannot obey God or our parents without the spirit's assistance and we cannot blame the Spirit for us not using the fruit of the Spirit in our behaviors.  We err on both sides in this instruction.  We teach them to expect right behavior from themselves and we teach them that they are culpable when they don't follow the right way.  When the Spirit does bless their behavior and give them grace to follow through, we should teach them to praise God.  And we should teach them to pray for help to do right!!!  We should also do the same!